Herr Führer . . . err . . . Hair Furor!

Today I’ll be brief.

For at least a year, one thing has been nagging at me: Donald Trump’s Hair. Every time I see him on the telly, two things happen: (a) I don’t listen to what he has to say (which is nothing anyway), and (b) I wonder about his hair. Who the hell combs it every morning? Not him, insufficient brain power.  And who trims it? Where did he get it? How many staff does it take to make him look roughly the same every day? If he were to become POTUS, how much would the national debt increase because of his hair’s upkeep expense?

So many questions, so few answers. We need to take the analytical approach.

So. Here goes nothin’ (so to speak). Thanks to Google, I managed to snag several Trump Hairdo Photos that show his daily ‘do’ from both sides. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find one from the back, so exactly how the end result is knit together we’ll still have to guess.

First, the right side. Note hair up top is combed forward from somewhere in back while hair on the side is combed backward to somewhere in the back. Overlap not visible.

Trump Hair Furor

Next, the view from his left side. Note that some hair is apparently combed up, over, and then to the back, but remains underneath the stuff from the back that’s combed forward. Meanwhile, the side below the “part” is combed down and to the back, presumably to cover and mask the other stuff from the back that’s combed forward. Or something like that.

Trump Hair Drumpf 2

Here’s a more detailed look at the left side where one can see a bit of the hair above the “part” that’s combed to the back, presumably to cover the stuff from the back that’s combed forward (see figure 1, above), while some is also combed under the stuff from the back that’s combed forward. Also, note that the hair below the “part” is combed backwards to eventually merge with everything else back there.

Trump Hair Drumpf

Finally, a photo of a younger Donald, taken after he went bald but before the hair transplants were installed (the ones that Ivana said must have been painful enough to affect his behavior). Note that what’s growing on the left side is long, although clearly not long enough for a left to right and back comb over. Makes me think the transplants were strategically placed to aid and abet the 2 or 3 comb overs and comb forwards that seem to be in place today.

Trump bald

HAIR FUROR!!!

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About frugalchariot

How Frugal is the Chariot That bears the Human soul. (Emily Dickinson)
This entry was posted in Politics, Satire, Teh Stupid. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Herr Führer . . . err . . . Hair Furor!

  1. Claude Robichaux says:

    This is hysterical, 100% accurate and hysterical -and scrolling up onto the last picture was a scream, both literally and figuratively. ahahahaaa haaa haaa

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